Weekend Project Hell

[Verse 1]
I’m Linda, thought I’d fix the bathroom sink,
A quick weekend project, how hard could it be?
YouTube said, “Two hours, you’re done in a wink,”
Now it’s month three, and I’m in too deep.
Hardware store knows me, I’m there every day,
Eleven trips, still don’t know what to say.

(sigh) ...Yeah, I’m basically a contractor now.

[Chorus]
Hammer and hope, I’m diggin’ my grave,
Weekend project, won’t let me be saved.
Hammer and hope, I’m losin’ my mind,
Three months in, no finish in sight.

[Verse 2]
Bathroom’s got no floor, just a hole to despair,
Pipes are laughin’ at me, leak everywhere.
Spouse stopped askin’, just walks past the mess,
Thinks I’m buildin’ a portal, I guess.
Bought a tool I can’t pronounce, cost a hundred bucks,
Still don’t know what it does, just my luck.

(spoken) And that’s when I knew I was doomed.

[Chorus]
Hammer and hope, I’m diggin’ my grave,
Weekend project, won’t let me be saved.
Hammer and hope, I’m losin’ my mind,
Three months in, no finish in sight.

[Bridge]
YouTube guy’s smilin’, “It’s easy, you’ll see,”
Bet he’s got a crew while I’m cryin’ in debris.
Hardware clerk’s my therapist, I’m confessin’ my sins,
“Ma’am, just hire someone,” but I can’t give in.

[Chorus]
Hammer and hope, I’m diggin’ my grave,
Weekend project, won’t let me be saved.
Hammer and hope, I’m losin’ my damn mind,
Three months in, no finish in sight.

[Outro]
I just wanted a sink, not this hell.
God, please send help, or a hotel.